You’ve likely heard the phrase, “Put your emotions to the side,” especially in moments of stress or decision-making. It’s a common piece of advice in professional environments, intense conversations, and high-pressure situations. The intention behind it is usually to encourage objectivity and prevent emotional responses from clouding judgment. But is this the best approach for our well-being and long-term success? Let’s dive into why emotions shouldn’t be sidelined and how acknowledging them can lead to better outcomes.

The Myth of Detaching from Emotions

The idea of setting emotions aside comes from a belief that logic should always rule our decisions. Emotions, we’re often told, can interfere with rational thought, leading to impulsive or irrational actions. While it’s true that unchecked emotions can sometimes lead to poor decisions, completely suppressing them can be equally damaging.

Emotions are part of who we are as human beings. They serve a purpose—they help us understand what matters to us, how we relate to others, and they guide us in protecting our values and needs. When we push emotions aside, we lose access to valuable information about ourselves and the situation at hand. Worse, suppressed emotions don’t just go away. They linger, often manifesting as stress, burnout, or even physical ailments.

Why Acknowledging Emotions is Powerful

Instead of pushing emotions to the side, we should focus on managing and understanding them. Emotional intelligence—the ability to recognize, understand, and manage your own emotions—has been shown to improve decision-making, relationships, and overall well-being. Here’s why acknowledging your emotions can be more effective than ignoring them:

1. Emotions Provide Insight
   Emotions offer clues about your needs, desires, and concerns. If you’re feeling angry, for example, it might be because a boundary has been crossed. Sadness could point to a loss or unmet need. When you acknowledge your emotions, you gain valuable insight into what’s driving your behaviour and what steps you need to take to address the underlying issue.
2. Better Decision-Making
   By tuning into your emotions, you can make more informed decisions. Instead of reacting impulsively out of fear or frustration, recognizing your emotions allows you to pause, reflect, and choose a response that aligns with both your rational and emotional needs. It’s about creating a balance, rather than letting emotions take full control or ignoring them altogether.
3. Healthy Relationships
   Emotions play a crucial role in communication and relationships. When you understand your own emotions and express them constructively, you foster deeper connections and trust with others. Conversely, pushing emotions to the side often leads to misunderstandings, unresolved conflicts, and disconnection from others.
4. Personal Growth
   Facing your emotions—both positive and negative—helps you grow. Emotions can be uncomfortable, but they also provide an opportunity for self-reflection and learning. By embracing them, you can discover what truly matters to you, what needs to change, and how to navigate challenges in a healthier way.

Balancing Emotions and Logic

It’s not about letting emotions run the show or solely relying on logic—it’s about balance. Here are a few ways to navigate your emotions without pushing them aside:

• Pause and Reflect: When emotions arise, take a moment to acknowledge them without acting on them immediately. Ask yourself, “What am I feeling, and why?” This pause helps you avoid reactive decisions and gives you the space to respond thoughtfully.
• Label Your Emotions: Simply naming what you’re feeling can reduce the intensity of emotions. It brings clarity and helps you see your emotions for what they are—signals that need to be understood, not suppressed.
• Find Healthy Outlets: Emotions need an outlet. Whether through talking with someone, journaling, or engaging in physical activity, finding a way to release pent-up emotions can prevent them from becoming overwhelming.
• Practice Self-Compassion: It’s okay to feel. Often, we judge ourselves for being emotional, but emotions are a natural and important part of being human. Be kind to yourself, and recognize that emotions are a tool for understanding yourself better.

Emotions Are a Guide, Not a Hindrance

Instead of putting your emotions to the side, consider bringing them into the conversation. They provide valuable insights that can lead to more authentic and effective choices in both your personal and professional life. Embracing your emotions doesn’t mean acting impulsively; it means learning to understand and manage them in a way that benefits you and those around you.

So, the next time someone tells you to push your emotions to the side, pause and consider how listening to them might actually bring you closer to the solution you’re seeking.

Book Recommendation: “Emotional Agility” by Susan David

If you’re interested in learning more about how to handle emotions in a healthy and productive way, I highly recommend Emotional Agility by Susan David. This book provides practical insights on how to embrace our emotions, navigate life’s challenges, and build emotional resilience. David offers a roadmap for developing self-awareness and using emotions as a guide to make better decisions and lead a more fulfilling life. It’s a great resource for anyone looking to strengthen their emotional intelligence.

Book Recommendation: “Emotional Advantage” by Randy Taran

If you’re looking to dive deeper into the power of emotions, Emotional Advantage: Embracing All Your Feelings to Create a Life You Love by Randy Taran is a fantastic read. This book explores how every emotion—even the ones we often label as “negative”—can serve a valuable purpose in our lives. Taran offers practical tools and insights to help readers harness their emotions, whether it’s anxiety, joy, or sadness, and turn them into powerful forces for growth, connection, and personal fulfillment.

With a blend of science, spirituality, and real-life examples, Emotional Advantage teaches us how to embrace our full emotional spectrum. It helps us transform our feelings into a deeper understanding of ourselves, leading to more meaningful relationships and greater emotional well-being. This book is a great resource for anyone interested in personal development, emotional intelligence, and leading a more authentic life.